Funny facebook updates: poop in a shoe

Tim: I’m finally getting my tune up for my Mac before the Apple Care runs out. Since I will likely not have a laptop for a week and I’m starting a new job, I won’t be around for awhile. In the mean time, Brad will be your go to guy for stupid status updates. Brad, don’t let me down. Good thing I have a GF right now, otherwise I’d be freaking out about not having access to free porn. She said if I’m lucky, I might be able to see a boob soon. and something about looking in the mirror.

Brad: You know, I’ve actually never posted a status message before. I’m just not half as witty as you, The Tim Winter. HOWEVER… I know Jennifer will try to fill your shoes.

Jenn: Fill his shoes with cat poop? Oh yes I can, and will, do that tonight while he’s sleeping.

Brad: I think human feces would be more appropriate.

Jenn: Well that could be tough. I’ll eat lots of fiber this weekend.

Brad: I didn’t say it had to be yours.

Jenn: Okay good cause I don’t poop. Girls don’t do that. Also, the Queen of England doesn’t fart. Tim does though.

Tim: I once pooped in an ex girlfriend’s shoes once. I guess I wouldn’t want to know what it would be like to be in her shoes. Ohh, God, that was a lame thing to say. But seriously, Jenn don’t poop in my shoes. You and your sick fetishes.

Brad: Tim, weren’t you the one who made murals with his own feces? Oh wait, that was me!




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Tongue tied tim is all amateur all the time; you won't find any big egos here but that's not to say we won't try our very best to get a laugh out of you. Not only is it okay to laugh at our expense we aim to try.

We are all about bringing you an uncensored account of all our awkward yet funny moments through our many ramblings, rants, raves, misguided attempts, indecent proposals, inappropriate and untimely remarks and bad one liners. some of us have even stopped taking our prescribed meds, against doctors' orders - so that might make for some good material.

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